Sphere of Influence | Ultimate Guide to Building (and Growing) Your SOI

Please note: This website contains affiliate links. As an Amazon Associate, we earn from qualifying purchases at no additional cost to you.

Growing your sphere doesn’t have to be difficult. Learn how simple it can be to tap into this important marketing resource.

In almost every real estate training seminar you attend or book you read, Realtors are told that they need to “work their sphere of influence.” For many of you, the thought of networking or calling acquaintances makes you cringe… am I right? But if you look at the recent stats from the National Association of REALTORS® 2025 Profile of Home Buyers and Sellers, a whopping 66% of home sellers found their agent through a referral or by using an agent they’d worked with before.

We don’t want you to miss out on potential referrals this year. so we’re going to break down (in bite-sized manageable chunks) how to build your sphere of influence and how to connect with them in meaningful, authentic ways.

OVERVIEW

Identifying Your Sphere
Gathering Contact Information
Organizing Your Sphere Data
Growing Your SOI
Segmenting Your Sphere into Groups
How Often You Should Reach Out
Putting a Plan in Place to Connect with Your SOI
Sphere of Influence Marketing Ideas
Frequently Asked Questions

Starting from Scratch: Identify Your Sphere

Your sphere includes everyone you know and all those with whom you come into contact on a fairly consistent basis. You don’t have to have thousands of people in your sphere. Focusing on 100 to 200 people who already know and trust you and would possibly refer clients to you is key.

Not sure know how to start building your list? We recommend scrolling through your phone and/or social media followers and writing down everyone you know. This includes:

Family
Friends
Neighbors
Past Buyer / Seller Clients
Former classmates who live in the area
Colleagues at your spouse’s work
Parents at your kid’s school
People from your gym, local sports team or play group
Connections in your Facebook groups
People who attend the same church or synagogue
Local businesses or services you frequently use:
- Hairdresser or Barber
- Barista at Coffee Shop
- CPA and/or Financial Planner
- Electrician and/or Plumber
- Doctor and/or Dentist
- Masseuse and/or Chiropractor
- Interior Designer

PRO TIP: As you go through the list of all the people you know, get your mindset right. Many new agents undermine their marketing efforts by being too shy or afraid of “bothering” people. In other words, don’t be a secret agent. If someone doesn’t want to receive your marketing email, they’ll unsubscribe. If they don’t want to receive your mailer, they’ll throw it away. It’s better to reach out to too many people than to reach out to too few.

Gather Information on Your SOI

Now that you have your list, you can start building a profile for each person in your sphere. Gather contact information, beginning with their phone number, email address, and social media handles, then obtain their mailing address if possible.

Once you have the basics, you can start adding other relevant information to their profile including birthdays, anniversaries, name of spouse and/or children, pets names, and other relevant information as it comes up. This gives you yet another way to reach out and “touch” your sphere and the members of their families.

TIP: If you don’t have the mailing address for many of the people in your SOI, send them a text before the holidays and let them know you’re getting your holiday cards ready and needed an updated address. For those of you that would normally feel uncomfortable asking for someone’s home address, the holidays can be the perfect excuse and won’t make you feel like a creepy salesperson!

Find a System to Store Your SOI Data

Your brokerage will probably provide you with a CRM or Customer Relationship Management platform where you will store all the information you gather on your sphere of influence. This should be integrated with marketing options for emailing, texting, messaging, or creating mailers and other graphic items designed to help you communicate effectively with your sphere. If you don’t have a CRM, you can organize your information in a spreadsheet or in the audience of an email platform like Mailchimp or Constant Contact.

If you’re a new real estate agent and/or don’t have the budget for a robust CRM system, please don’t let that stop you from building your sphere of influence list. You could easily use a spreadsheet (Excel or Google Sheets) to include phone numbers, addresses, and other important information that will help you connect with them in the years to come. Or check out our list of 32 free tools every real estate agent should be using, which includes a couple of genuinely free CRM options worth trying first.

Reaching out: Growing Your Sphere

Prioritize the growth and development of your sphere of influence, both by adding to the information you have on current members and by adding new contacts. If you meet a new friend at the golf course, add that person to your sphere. When you have a new home buyer lead, add them to your sphere. If you’re on social media and connect with someone, add their handle to your CRM. Make updating and adding to your SOI part of your routine, as important as bookkeeping or transaction management.

First Contact with Your Sphere of Influence

There are 101 ways to start connecting with the people in your SOI. We recommend keeping it simple, authentic, and PERSONAL. You could send them a handwritten note or a holiday card with your real estate logo. The easiest way to start connecting is to visit their social media pages and comment on their posts. Another option is to just pick up the phone and call them to say “hello” and see how they’re doing. If you have people in your sphere who are particularly well-connected or interested in real estate, set up a coffee date!

The goal is to reach out in a way that feels organic and authentic. You want to establish new relationships and enhance your current ones.

Segmenting Your SOI

One way to ensure that the content and communication you send is always meaningful, relevant, and engaging is by segmenting your sphere of influence. You may want to segment your list in a variety of ways, including the following:

Personal vs. Professional Contacts
Local vs. Out-of-town Contacts
Leads vs. Current Clients vs. Past Clients
Close contacts vs. Acquaintances
Online vs. IRL Friends

You will also want to categorize your leads by urgency. For example, those who want to buy now vs. those who are on the fence. The more you can categorize the members of your sphere, the easier it will be to find reasons to reach out to them.

PRO TIP: Take a look at your SOI and find 10 to 25 people who are most likely to refer business to you. These could be some of your closest friends or people who are influencers and are actively involved in the community. Once you have that “A-List” you can create a specific plan to connect with them several times throughout the year. Keep reading for some ideas to engage and stay top of mind with your A-Listers….

How Often You Should Reach Out

This is one of the most common questions we get, and it’s a fair one — the guides above tell you what to send, but not how often. Most coaches converge on a similar range: somewhere around 24 to 36 touches per year across your whole sphere, mixing personal outreach (a call, a text, a handwritten note) with broader “mass” touches (a newsletter, a social post, a mailer).

Your A-List deserves more frequent, more personal contact than the rest of your sphere. A simple tiered approach works well for most agents:

A-List (your closest 10-25 contacts): a personal touch every 2-4 weeks
Warm contacts: a personal touch monthly, plus your regular newsletter
Everyone else in your sphere: your monthly newsletter, holiday touches, and occasional check-ins are enough

Consistency matters more than volume. A short monthly text to your whole sphere builds more trust over a year than one long, heartfelt call you only manage once.

Putting It To Work: Optimizing Your Sphere

You’ve put together the information you need, reached out for the first time, and segmented your list for more relevant communication. Now it’s time to optimize the SOI information you’ve gathered so that you can consistently market to people who know, like, and trust you already.

Remember, it’s easier to convert a warm lead (someone you know) than a cold one (a stranger from the internet or social media). This is especially true when you’re first starting out in real estate. For a deeper dive into turning these relationships into consistent business, see our guides on Building a Real Estate Business on Referrals and The Referral Flywheel. Be sure to reach out on a consistent basis to your sphere in the following ways:

Send monthly eNewsletters to your SOI to share information about the current real estate market, homeowner tips, local developments, neighborhood events, featured listings, client testimonials, etc. New to this? Check out our Beginner’s Guide to Email Marketing.
Spend 15 to 20 minutes each day commenting on your sphere’s social media posts (pro tip: set a timer, or you’ll blink and suddenly it’s an hour later and you’ve watched fourteen home renovation videos that have nothing to do with your sphere)
Phone calls or in-person meetups with your most engaged members to touch base or follow up on other communications.
Handwritten notes to your closest contacts for special occasions, congratulations, and thank yous with email blasts or social media outreach to more distant acquaintances.
Send out holiday cards each year — we recommend sending Thanksgiving or New Year cards because won’t get lost in the holiday shuffle. Need inspiration? See our Thanksgiving Marketing Ideas for Real Estate Agents.
If you’re invited to an event that members of your sphere are attending, be sure to make an appearance and have a one-on-one conversation with each person in your sphere.
Follow-up communication to past clients to keep them engaged and to stay top of mind. (Remember, it’s cheaper to retain a satisfied client than to cultivate a new one!)
Communication and invitations for client or SOI appreciation events.

Marketing to your A-List

While the 10 to 25 people on your A-List will receive your monthly eNewsletter, holiday cards, etc you want to do a few more things to show them how much you value your relationship and stay top of mind. Here are a few of our favorites:

Call them to check in at least once a year
Send birthday cards
Invite them to coffee or dinner
If you both have kids or dogs, invite them to the playground or the dog park
Get a season pass for two to the local sports team (football, hockey, basketball) and offer them tickets
Invite to holiday parties or fundraisers you’re hosting
Mail and/or drop off small gifts throughout the year – this could be a St. Patty’s Day card with a lottery ticket, 4th of July sparklers for the kids, a pumpkin in October, and holiday ornaments or baked gifts in the winter, or check out our 15 Spring Pop-By Gift Ideas for warmer-weather inspiration. There are hundreds of ideas on Pinterest – just search “pop by gift ideas for realtors” and we promise that you’ll be inspired!

The key to having a successful real estate business building REAL relationships with people in your community. You need to add value, share your expertise (when needed), and have some fun experiences with the friends and acquaintances who are in your SOI. It’s not about handing out your business card to everyone you meet and hoping that the phone rings.

If you put in the work early in your career and consistently strive to connect with your sphere, you’ll be amazed at the number of referrals you’ll receive each year.

Frequently Asked Questions

How many people should be in my sphere of influence?

Most coaches recommend starting with 100 to 200 people — everyone who already knows and trusts you. Experienced agents often grow this to 300-500+ over time, but the number matters less than consistency. A smaller list you actually contact regularly outperforms a huge list you never touch.

How often should I contact my sphere of influence?

Plan on roughly 24 to 36 touches per year across your whole sphere, with more frequent, personal contact for your closest A-List relationships. See the full breakdown above for a tiered approach by contact type.

What’s the difference between sphere of influence and farming?

Your sphere of influence is made up of people who already know you personally — friends, family, past clients, acquaintances. Farming, by contrast, targets a specific geographic neighborhood full of strangers who don’t know you yet. Both are valuable lead sources, but SOI marketing is almost always cheaper and converts faster since the trust is already built.

How long does it take to see referrals from my sphere of influence?

It compounds rather than pays off immediately — don’t expect referrals in your first few weeks of outreach. Most agents start seeing steady referral business after 6 to 12 months of consistent touches, and it tends to grow every year after that as your sphere gets used to hearing from you regularly.

—————————–